There are a lot of people who accompany you on a ride; There are very few people who accompany you all your life.
Someone said: "We will meet 8263563 people in our lives, 39,778 people will greet us, we will be familiar with 3,619 people, we will be close to 275 people, and we will disappear into the sea of people." ”Those who come from the sea of people will be returned to the sea of people in the end, so there is no need to be entangled. Life is like a dream of Nanke, not only will you lose your relatives and friends, but even you will be lost out of the world.
The Tao is different, do not conspire with each other", think about it, the people who often contact you, suddenly do not contact you, can not escape the following reasons.
First, money: When people get rich, they are afraid that their relatives and friends will borrow money.
On Zhihu, someone asked: "What should I do if I accidentally won the super jackpot." ”
In Gao Zan's reply, there are three sentences: "If you have more money, it is a choice, not a life; There are many choices, but there is not much time; Put it away first, don't rush. ”Many people think that when they have money, the first thing they do is to invite relatives and friends to a meal, show off, and then talk about their grand blueprint.
Not all truths are like this.
There are always many people, who are sober-minded, and suddenly have money, and begin to pretend to be poor, worried that those relatives and friends who eat and drink will come to borrow money; There are also some people who quickly found a way and joined a circle that is more suitable for them, as for the previous poor circle, they don't care.For example, a person who picks soil on the construction site tries his best to get a certain qualification certificate, and then changes jobs to a position with a monthly income of tens of thousands. He doesn't necessarily brag about himself, but says goodbye to the past once and for all and steps into a new role.
If a worker on the construction site comes to him, he can make a state of "not knowing", worrying that he will be pulled into the water by the worker and expose the old bottom.
The most shameful thing is that someone borrows money and then quickly disappears. mistakenly thought that he was "rich" and could get away with it.
A person's level and pattern cannot be measured by money, but the amount of money does make many people live an invincible life.
Second, level: people at different levels will eventually be separated.
There is a way that the levels are different, and there is no need to be strong.
If you meet people at different levels, you just come together, and you still have to leave in the end. After all, people are just going to accompany you for a certain goal.
In the fourteenth volume of the Ming Dynasty** "West Lake Two Episodes", there is a village called Jinsha, where people are murderous and have no kindness at all.
Guanyin Bodhisattva turned into a young fishing girlEvery day, he carries fish to the village market and sells it. Many young men came and quickly bought the fish. There are also men, under the pretense of bargaining, to say a few more words.
One day, the fishing girl said, if anyone can recite the book "Pumen Pin", I will marry him.
The man in the village, after a few days, memorized the book.
The fishing girl said: "There are many people who can endorse, and I am also worried." In this way, whoever can recite the Diamond Sutra, I will marry him. ”
After a few days, three men will be able to recite the Diamond Sutra.
The fishing girl was worried and said, "If you three can recite the Lotus Sutra, I will marry him." ”
Through gradual induction, the villagers developed a habit of reading, and the fishing girl turned back into Guanyin Bodhisattva and left with a smile.
In order to thank Guanyin Bodhisattva for his teachings, the people in the village carved the "Fish Basket Guanyin" and placed it at the entrance of the village.
After Song Lian, a scholar of the Ming Dynasty, learned about this incident, he said"In an instant, he turned bad. ”
It is clear that Guanyin has completed the task of edification and will disappear immediately, not interfering too much in the lives of the villagers; On the other hand, she is a god and cannot stay in the village for long.In ancient times, the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl fell in love with each other, but the people and immortals had different paths, and they still left regrets. That's why the levels are different.
The road of life is a journey and a journey; Therefore, socializing is one plus one at a time.
The interaction between people, many times, is like a car shuttling through the city, every traffic light intersection, will stop, and encounter a lot of cars; The street lights changed, and the vehicles left the intersection one after another.
One goes to a higher place, one stays put, and one goes lower. They can't get along forever.
One went to the north to work, one went to the south to make a living, and the other farmed in his hometown. Their distance is objective.
What level are you at now? What level will it be in the future? If you see clearly, you will understand interpersonal relationships.
Third, value: your value has been used and will not be needed in the future.
During the Three Kingdoms period, Sun Quan wanted to know the appearance of the land of China.
Prime Minister Zhao Da has a younger sister Zhao, who is good at painting, and depicts the appearance of mountains and rivers vividly. As a result, the Zhao family naturally became Sun Quan's concubine.
After Zhao married Sun Quan, he demonstrated his ability in brocade embroidery and silk curtains, and also helped Sun Quan embroider a map of China's rivers and mountains; In the summer, Zhao made a curtain that could not only prevent mosquitoes, but also breathe wind, and solved the sleep problem of the sergeants.
The people of Wu Guo all praised it"Wu has three uniques, and there is no wonder in the four seas. ”
In the end, Sun Quan abolished Zhao's position as a concubine on the grounds that "the Zhao family likes to show off".
On the surface, Sun Quan did nothing wrong, but in essence, it was the Zhao family that had used all his skills and no longer had any use value.
When people reach a certain age, they will find that interpersonal communication is essentially to use each other. If your value is no longer what others need, then you are no longer the object of constant contact. As soon as you turn around, you are beaten into the "cold palace" by the other party.Teacher Chen Guo said: "The motivation of socializing: the relationship between interests and the practical relationship in the future - building contacts - utilitarian purposes." ”
Those who come for value will eventually leave because they lose value. Don't be upset, it's not that people don't socialize, but they have found a new circle of value exchange.
Life is like a marathon, everyone has to rush to the finish line.
When it comes to the end, it means that "the end of the song is over". There will be a marathon next time, but the people around you are no longer the same people.
The carriage used to be slow, so it was slow to leave; The car is fast now, so the speed of departure is "all of a sudden".
It's good to cherish the feelings of the moment, be a good person, and have a clear conscience.
There are always some people, ** lying in their phones, but will never be contacted again. As an ordinary person, you should deal with it like this: first, don't get entangled and accept reality; second, to be an unsociable person, relying on yourself in everything; Third, enhance your own value and increase your social bargaining chips.
Don't waste too much energy on "gathering and scattering".
Those who come, welcome; Those who go, do not send.